What's The Frequency, Kenneth?

Most newspaper stories aren't as good as they could be, and it's a constant frustration. For countless reasons, like few key sources willing to speak candidly or the reporter simply not having the time in between other projects to perfect it, articles go to print lacking useful details or containing mistakes.

It's why I try not to rip into local news too much. Reporters are paid little for their important work and are often viewed with disdain. But I'd like to point out this story, "Pennsylvania's bats doomed," from today's local paper, because I think it's a good example of how mistakes happen all the time in this industry. (Again, full disclosure: I worked for the paper's teen section for several years, was a sports correspondent for a bit and nearly an intern there this summer).

The actual news in this story is that the bat population of Pennsylvania will (probably?) fall considerably. This story's length, however, is gigantic as far as newsprint goes. As newsprint continues to shrink while ad revenue disappears, copy this long should be devoted to huge investigative pieces, especially since the readers' interest inevitably wanes.

This was obviously not an investigative piece. Greg Turner, a biologist with the Pennsylvania Game Commission, is essentially the only source in the story. There's another person, except that she's introduced early on but only adds an odd quote at the end of the story in conversation with Turner, if that makes sense. Anyway, Turner says these mounting deaths prove to be an important topic. So far, so good; there are environmental problems in the rural state of Pennsylvania, something that will affect its proud residents. Okay, why should people care?

Here's the telling 'graph, "Whether you like bats or they creep you out, the loss of them has ramifications for us all." That's a very important point, and it's crucial to answer why this is important right away in this story. Unfortunately, it's in the 29th 'graph out of 33. Many people are frightened by bats and are unaware of all the good they do. This had to be addressed immediately, not tacked on at the end in a disjointed manner.

I don't doubt Turner's expertise, nor the importance of what he's trying to say, but what's the real news here? Why is Turner given 28 inches (more than 800 words) in a newspaper with a circulation of about 85,000 subscribers (plus online, where I read it) to assess a possible mass death of bats?

Staff Writer Ad Crable uses phrases here like "people hanging out around lakes may find more bites" that are so informal it looks like it came straight from his interview notes. Most of the mistakes would only bother a j-school kid, probably, but they are the errors of a new journalist, not a strong (and I do mean that) environmental reporter like Crable.

There are too many broken rules though, stuff like how you aren't supposed to write "you" or address the reader, or refer to yourself as part of the group, using "us." "Hopefully" is not supposed to be used to start a sentence, grammatically speaking. There's only one Game Commission, so it would be singular and thus "it" is its pronoun, not "them." Combined with how confusing the story is due to it's very long length and the sequencing that jerks the reader around, these mistakes are surprising.

I'm not writing any of this to point out errors made by others, I myself am no grammar expert and make quite a few mistakes, especially with hyphens. What I'm really getting at here is that reporters these days genuinely struggle to put the story out they expect of themselves. There are so many inhibitors, and I think what struck here was a lack of time. Perhaps Crable had to fill space and stretched this bit of news that had little urgency well beyond its breaking point. Or maybe time just ran out, who knows? Or maybe this is a story the folks at Lancaster Newspapers look at as solid. It's possible.

It's still an example that journalists mess up like everyone else, but their errors are much more widespread. The mistakes are printed and distributed for everyone to see. And there is no greater sense of scrutiny than the subject of a story reading the final product. That total exposure can be phenomenal or awful, usually depending on a few strokes of luck.

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Pennsylvania's Bats Doomed